I was a picky eater as a kid. I still am in a lot of ways, but I’m more open to trying new foods, which has been one of the fun things about exploring Judaism and kosher food. The traditional Ashkenazi stuff has all been new to me, and a lot is stuff I would never have considered trying otherwise. Gefilte fish, it’s a problem. I was delighted and vindicated to read that the British Jews do fry it, as that seemed to me like the only possible strategy when I first opened a package of it. My people! You understand! Similarly, cold marinated herring in a jar just creeps me out. But kippers, nice and hot and buttery, that I can do.
The meal above is one of my fusion attempts, trying to merge stuff that’s traditional for me with a Jewish diet. Kippers with butter, toasted challah rolls with more butter and a dab of Marmite, and by G-d a cup of tea. (The Guinness glass to the side is unrelated as it’s my all-purpose water glass.) The challah rolls are working for me like gangbusters–putting out two full loaves every Shabbat is just wasteful for me, living alone, but a bag of the small rolls can last me pretty well in the fridge and they look cute. It looks to me like having two rolls set out under the cover fulfills the obligation just like having two big loaves, since a roll is certainly more than the size of an olive and complete in itself, but I might be wrong. If you already like Marmite or if you think you can appreciate the delights of a salty-yeasty table spread, then I can tell you that yeah, putting it on challah is a good idea. Is it kosher? Looks that way!
Kippers do have a bone issue, so not so good for Shabbat, but the ones I bought fresh from the fish section had wayyyy more bones than the frozen Neptune-brand package which is boil in the bag–if those could be heated up and drained before candle-lighting and kept warm for dinner, they’d work. All dat Omega-3 fo me, and apparently they’re not too mercurified to eat more than once a week.
Tea with dinner is a major comfort thing for me that reminds me of my mother; I don’t know how widespread it is outside the Maritimes, and it feels like it’s in decline, but when I was in the hospital here in Ontario it was served with every meal, so who knows. I made tea ahead of time for Shabbat dinner this week (I like it strong) and it felt like everything clicked into place. A nice warm teapot on the Shabbat table is, dare I say it, heimisch.
ragecomic by me.
So one of my kosher exceptions (for now) is that I order delivery from non-kosher restaurants so long as the meal I’m ordering could conceivably be kosher: pizza with only cheese and vegetables, or shawarma/donair, etc. One of the places I usually order from makes a low-rent Caesar salad with only lettuce and croutons. Perfect. Last night I bought some stuff (because TIRED and HUMIDITY), including a salad, which I put in the fridge for later. Oh, the joys of having something saved for later that I didn’t cook myself. It is a sweet secret to hold to one’s bosom. I didn’t even open the box.
I just opened it. Bacon bits.
I suppose the silver lining is that I have never, ever liked bacon bits so this is only a disappointment, not a temptation to fall off the wagon. Even before I started going kosher I would have made a face and tried to flick them off the salad, but now I have to throw the whole thing out. And my jonesing for garlicky lettuce will have to wait for later.
Lesson: always, always, always specify with Caesar salad. Or move to a place with kosher restaurants. Or don’t be lazy like me and make your own salad.